I am 31 and I have been in a long-term relationship since I was My heart goes out to you. No matter how mutual the decision was, coming out of a year relationship is extremely difficult and since you were only 15 when it started, your entire adult identity has been formed within the confines of that relationship.
Relationship dissolution is always stressful, but finding yourself alone at 31 is particularly so.
A break-up can affect almost every aspect of your daily life, from where you live, to what you do in your free time, to the even bigger questions. You may want to have children and may be worrying about when that will now happen.
On the upside, this is also an exciting time for you — a fresh start and a new journey.
While your desire to move on is understandable — you have, after all, grown up as one half of a whole — I would urge you to pause, and take a breath before you start dating again. This break-up provides you with an opportunity to focus on yourself and if you meet someone new immediately, that opportunity will be lost. Try to enjoy this period of reassessing your life, both romantic and otherwise, and enjoy the freedom to make decisions that are yours and yours alone.
You are curious about having sex with other men, but have you explored own sexual responses? Boyfriends may come and go, but your body is with you for life — so take this time to learn about yourself, work out what you really want, and take it slowly. Women in relationships are less likely to masturbate than women who are single, but the number of women who enjoy solo sex or who admit to it, for it is still a taboo subject for many is very low.
The reason this depresses me is that, as proven by research by the psychologists David Hurlbert and Karen Whittaker in their study, women who masturbate are more sexually confident and competent. The study showed that they report fewer arousal difficulties, are more sexually adventurous and have a higher orgasm frequency during sex with a partner.