It sounds weird, right? Makes you imagine a bunch of fully grown adults sitting in a classroom, uncomfortably taking notes while wondering how to possibly interact with the opposite sex.
So kind of like normal school, only without the pain of acne and having to find a formal date. In other words, the very term 'dating school' implies having to go back in time in order to learn something you really should have picked up from real-life experiences the first time around.
But according to dating expert and psychologist Melanie Schillingwho also runs her own online dating programthere is no shame to having 'missed' the ins and outs of dating culture, quite simply because Australia doesn't really have one. The awkwardness doesn't end there, either.
Schilling rightly points out that, for a nation known for being outgoing and friendly, we are surprisingly cagey when it comes to interactions with strangers of the opposite sex. We just don't have that openness to crossing boundaries. We're very protective," Schilling said. Given Schilling's stance on the Aussie dating culture not being too crash-hot to begin with, it's no surprise she finds the popularity of online dating has only made things worse.
What happens to our self esteem? Where does that factor in?
What [dating school] is actually about is date readiness. It boosts esteem and builds rapport. Self respect is alluring. The next steps involve getting into what Schilling describes as "a positive dating mindset" and developing your "personal dating brand.
There can be a lot of rejection.
So it's really important to build up your resilience and internal resources. It's defining yourself from the inside out, determining your values and the things that are fundamentally important to you. It's at this stage Schilling says some people come to a stumbling block, as she advises them to focus on finding people with similar values instead of what they perceive as attractive physical qualities.
On the flip side, you're stepping into something much more authentic," Schilling said. I hear it all the time.